Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

knock knock There's no door

Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot. WOW your racist!

Your mam is so fat.

Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

Adam Chebali has no life

What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

Why did the computer load on facebook? Thats what you typed in.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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