If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

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You say: Why did the chicken cross the road? Response: Why? (or some other answer to a different joke) You say: To get to your house! Knock, knock. Response: Who's there? You say: The CHICKEN!!!!

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

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Which is the rarest animal in the North pole? The Polaroid.

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Justin Beiber

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

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Sorry Liz, his sodium levels are so bad that while he is drinking a lot, his body is not containing water, and while his pulse and breath is fine he is passing out from time to time, he is asking for stimulants Ritalin specifically, but I am not sure if his body could withstand that, I really don't mind to pry, but does he use Ritalin? I mean he chats a lot, but ADHD? I am just asking out of health concerns, not that I am a doctor, but I just worry... Flirty personality... More like a clown, he says he refuses to eat unless I breastfeed him XD. He is eating now though, solids work, never had a tougher patient, he will make it for sure.

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Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the US. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

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What's the difference between a soldier and a black man? A black man lives a normal life, probably working a full time job to bring income to his family. A soldier has seen his friends killed right before his very eyes, has probably killed, and most likely has night terrors accompanied by the sounds of gunshots and grenades. He will suffer trauma up until he dies of a heart attack in his mid 80's after experiencing a terrifying flashback of life in the war.

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How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

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How do you get a black man to run? Ask him how his day has been, catch up on some memories of your time at school together, then challenge him to a foot race.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How do you sneak Jews across the border? In an ashtray.

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops