A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Hispanic guy walks into a bar. The white guy orders a beer, the black guy orders a shot of vodka, the Asian guy orders a sake, and the Hispanic guy orders a shot of tequila. They were drinking and having a great time.

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Nero, you got followers, people that believe in you, ironically maybe a lot less now, that I have been giving them the fake illusion that I am you, why did you never reveal your true self? Is there something wrong with you physically? Something you fear being judged upon? I love and admire your work, and you to be honest, I know you are married and all, but my heart has chosen its path, it cant be helped really, believe me, I have tried. Dont lose hope in yourself, sometimes you have to accept that you are smarter, wiser, more compassionate and vulnerable than the rest, allowing yourself to be a vulnerable person, also shows how strong you are, if you shut it all away in order to become "strong", you know you end up alone and forgotten. I understand why someone such as you loses hope in humanity, but as long as you hold into the hope of you having the wisdom and courage required to stand on your own with pride rather than shame of your strength and individuality as a human being, something ever rarer I concur, then you have the right to consider yourself greater rather than some arrogant jackass, believe me, I know the man I am speaking about.

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A white,mexican and asian man are walking together on the beach. They find a genie lamp and the genie says"since there are 3 of u u each get one wish" the black man says " i wish that all the mexicans would go back to mexico. " the asian man says " i wish all the asians would go back to asia" and the white man says " wait so the mexicans and asians arent in america right?" the genie said "that is correct!" the white man says " oh ok ill just taqke a coke then!"

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Yo momma so fat she should be concerned of contracting Coronary Heart Disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, abnormal blood fats, metabolic syndrome, cancer, osteoarthritis, sleep apnea, or even obesity hypoventilation syndrome

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Knock knock whos there? Jake jake who? jake from state farm, and i'd like to tell you about our insurance company

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A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

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What did the man say when he saw a giant herd of elephants coming? "Look! There's a giant herd of elephants coming!"

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why did the boy fall off his bicycle? because his dad threw a refrigerator at him.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance abuse, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life, and was appalled by his bad decisions.

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how much could a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck could chuck wood? it doesnt matter because they can not chuck wood

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Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because her family lived in the countryside and her family's income was very far below average and in the time of her miraculous breakthrough, automobiles were for the wealthy families and obviously her family was not wealthy. She wouldn't have been able to drive even if she wasn't blind or def. The economy pretty much hated her and her family.

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How does a black man put puzzles together? First, he locates the four corners. Next, he begins filling in the sides. Finally, he uses the picture on the box to fill in the center. It can be a very tedious process if he is not paying attention.

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Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

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What happen to the girl that received chocolate on Valentine's day? She had a allergic reaction.

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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What's a Democrat's favorite activity? Blaming Republicans for shit they didn't do.

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i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

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How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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