I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

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MC donald the duck loves Justin's Balls. And Daniel Ma loves fried chicken boiled with rice \Cupcake

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What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

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What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was tired of the people on the side she was on who told lame anti jokes, so she tried to stay away from them.

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A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

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Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

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The man was driving down the road at an opropriat speed and got t-boned. The women in the other car got out and tried to help the man but the man was already out of the car and call 911

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Smoke weed till i die nigga

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face! -Lets go Mets

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Where did the Jew put his money? In a low rist, interest bearing mutual fund.

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If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

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YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

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How many finger does a normal person have? 8...and 2 thumbs!!

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What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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