Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

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A. Why did the man crash the car? B. Because the driver was a blind man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

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how many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb. 1 the wife to go buy the light bulb and the husbend to put it in.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

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Women's rights

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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Why did the hunter shoot the deer? Because he was hungry and might starve to death if he didnt

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What comes after 69... Mouthwash

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Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

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you dint have to be a jew matt

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Vegeta, What does the scouter say about his power level? It's Over 9000!!!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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why does my ass hurt? you have rectal cancer

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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Stones cannot fly. Humans cannot fly either. Therefore.. I wish I didn't get AIDS...

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Nick Cannon

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops