How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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A train poops its pants.

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Guy: Hey, you want to dance with me? Girl: Who me? Guy: Nooo that bench over there...

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

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What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Another holocaust.

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Im gay What about you

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What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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Your momma is so stupid your momma forgot that jesus did exist and has been proven by historians to have existed

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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What's the difference between an eight year old girl and a Jew? Only one comes back from camp.

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Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

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An Arabic Muslim is on a plane. He's flying to Chicago.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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What do you call a man in Afghanistan? Either a scuicide bomber a soldier or a tep

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What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops