If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Why couldn't the little girl color in her coloring book? Her arms were amputated.

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from."

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Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

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Why couldn't the black guy vote? He was only 17.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

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What did the giraffe say to the walrus? Nothing. Giraffes can't talk. What did the Scotsman say to the walrus? Nothing. Scotsmen can't talk.

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What's black, white, and red all over? That could describe any number of objects.

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roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are red Jimmy is red Sally is red Susie is red Jimmy is red Billy is red Carl is red Jose is red Jerry is red Ferdinand is red Everyone is red Because they all just got shot In the head And now they're dead

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

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Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

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Where's the dick??? east

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- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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