What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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what do you do when you forget to do your math homework? kill your teacher

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

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Hi my name is Lisa Hi Lisa my name is Karen. Nice to meet Karen Likewise...

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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A young black man walks into a KFC. He takes a quick stop in the bathroom and continues on the road to his ivy league college.

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A horse walked into a bar and ordered a drink. It was nothing out of the ordinary because the Everett-Wheeler interpretation of quantum mechanics is correct and he lived in a parallel universe in which the roles of humans and horses are reversed.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Robert. Robert who? Robert Anderson.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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Your mom went to college

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why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could walk into the mall and kill hundreds of innocent lives and leave thousands wounded.

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What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

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Rick santorum

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What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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besides saying "Oh, Yeah" and punching down walls, what does the kool-aid man do? drink cool aid

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Knock Know! Come in!

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Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

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my egg roll

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops