Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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So a guy is on his way to work and he nearly gets hit by a bus. He sticks his middle finger up at the bus driver but a couple seconds later he realized that it was the same bus he was supposed to get on so he apologized to the bus driver and got on the bus. He was 15 minutes late for the 420th time this week so he was fired from his job and went back home. On his way home he was not allowed on the bus because he left his oyster card somewhere so he had to walk home. 69 minutes later he arrives home to his wife and kids. What did the man say to his wife when he got back home? "Hi."

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Why did Jimmy throw butter out the window? Because he had down syndrome

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What do you call a man with a knife in his back? An ambulance

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What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

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Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust Whats worse that the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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pady irish man paddy english man and paddy african man go on a magic slide wat ever you say will be at the bottem paddy irish man said gold paddy english man silver paddy african man almost fell off so he said shit buthalf way down he thought it was fun so he said wee

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A Jew walks on his way to work. He does not notice the quarter lying on the sidewalk and did not care for the dollar lying on the other side of the road.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

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Adele walks into a bar. The barman says she's too ugly hahahahahahahahahahhahahahha lololololololololololololol

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why did the man drop his razor? he had a seizure.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sociopathic murderer.

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Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

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There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

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What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

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A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

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Whats the defination of cruelty

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Barney is a dinosaur We see on medication! And when we are high on drugs He's a hallucination!

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A man walks into a bar... has a beer then leaves to his beautiful wife and his 2 children

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops