I’m on the new Seefood Diet… I can only eat Fish or shell fish

What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

The Charlotte Bobcats winning more than 10 games

why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead How did the second koala fall out of the tree? it was hit by the first one how did the third koala fall out of the tree? it thought it was a game and jumped off

There is a 5 second long and extremely depressing video, most cant watch it for any longer than 6 seconds

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

Two peanuts were walking down the street. Well actually, they just rolled a bit and then stopped. Peanuts don't have legs.

Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

what did the bot get for his birthday? .. men!

what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

why did the two girls fight? Because they were mad at eachother.

A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? pretty much everything because dead babies aren't a laughing matter

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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