What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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What does a homeless man get for his birthday? 25 cents

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

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Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

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4 hours later.

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Why do gingers have red hair? Its genetically encoded in their DNA

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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There is a man laying on the floor in a pool of blood and vomit, there is a broken beer bottle in a puddle of beer next to him. He thinks is a sponge.Purple

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What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

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A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

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What to hear an anti-joke? No.

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Me: did u here the one about the girl got hit by a car? Man: no what happened? Me: She is in the hosspital with slight fractures and a broken wrist, but she will live

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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