Without geometry life would be pointless

Do you play piano? No

How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

whats your budget like? a budget.

Q. How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Light bulbs don't exist

did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

Why should you never trust anglers? Because they're always into fishy business... Why should you never trust hunters? Because they carry loaded guns...

Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

what is big and can make things come out? a gun

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

how did the kenyan get away from the cup He didnt he got arrested

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

Your mom is so stupid, she thought the square root of pie was 3.14156

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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