Why did Jimmy throw butter out the window? Because he had down syndrome

What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

What do you call a man with a knife in his back? An ambulance

A Jew walks on his way to work. He does not notice the quarter lying on the sidewalk and did not care for the dollar lying on the other side of the road.

Infamous last words: "Phew these Germans are finally gonna let us take a shower! Okay who farted! And do not lie because it smells like gas in here!" "Oh Crickey! That reptoil looks dangerous! Good thing I am immune to reptoils... Wait are Manta-Roys reptoils? uh oh..." "Hi OJ dear! Say hello to my brothe..." Moral: Hmm my chest hurts I wonder if... YAAAAaaaaaaaaaaRAGHGHGhGHGHG *dead* RESURRECTION! Phew...

What is invisible and smells like cheese? Cheese. I lied about the invisible part, because cheese is not invisible.

Guide on how to make the color yellow for yourself! First, you grab green, and then you remove all the blue... AND YELLOW COLOR GET! While you are reading this I am fingering your sister... WHAAAAT? She is only a baby you say? Well... Moral: Ugh... The ending was so wrong in so many ways... I should totally rewrite this and call it EXTENDED DIRECTORS EDITION... I cant bother... Oren The laroM naM! OR !naM laroM ehT oreN So anyway, Christiaaaans, its ask and you shall receive right? Virgin Mary is not virgin anymore because I asked if you know what I mean... ;) NOW FIRE THE STORM OF RED THUMBS MWAHAHAHAHAHA I AM THE HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALPYSE! I AM THE RED DRAGON.... OR EVEN WORSE... I AM THE DARK LORD SANTA!!!!!! Nevermind, ugh... Santa is just too disgusting, sorry, I meant Satan, phew, thats a relief on my concience... I should probably take my finger out of your sister... ...And insert the GREAT BIGGUS DICKUS! Your sister only two years? Ugh... Well, SHE WILL GROW INTO IT... Ugh, I dont wanna post this, but I bet Ryu sometimes dont want to go HADOUUUUKEEEEEEN Just so a slow projectile takes of like 2 percent of his enemies life... SO... One TWO TH... Oh wait, I must solvemedia first. Ice to meet you? Thats pathetic.

why cant ben cry, because i gorged his eyes out with a popsickle stick.....

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

Q:the is a mexican and a black guy in the car who id driving? A:the cop

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

A terrorist robs a walrus.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

What do you call a fat man who can turn slim? I don't know

What did God say to the priest while he was masturbating.... ... God doesn't exist.

anti jokes are gay...your all gay

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

this website even though its hilarious.

Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

Why couldn't the black man get a high-paying job? because he lived during the harsh and cruel times of slavery.

Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set? neither did she.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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