ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, WITHOUT MY HEART I CANNOT LOVE YOU

Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're adopted and Santa Claus isn't real

Vagina.

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

What is worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

Hey, wanna hear a penis joke? Nevermind, it's too long.

person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

This sentence is a lie.

Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

What happens when a black man dies in France? A funeral procession.

Why couldn't the black guy vote? He was only 17.

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

Your wife died during the delivery.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

What's worse than having to tie one of your shoelaces after walking 5 miles? Getting a 56 year old mixture of blood, urine and sperm injected in your asshole.

what happened when the sports mascot ate a bean and cheese burrito? he shat inside his costume and got fired.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? wheres my farmer?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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