What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the comedian tell the audience? A well thought out joke that anyone can relate to because that is what the point of a joke is.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +24

-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the gay's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's a good joke? Not this one.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops