So a duck walks into a pharmacy and says "i need some ointment for my beak, its rather chapped." and the Pharmacist said "Sorry we don't have anything for ducks here."

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how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

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What do you call a Black Priest? His title would probably be Reverend, and then his last name after it.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face"? The horse does not respond, because it is a horse and lacks any cognitive ability to speak or understand English. Instead, it becomes confused by its surroundings, takes a dump on the floor, and gallops out of the bar knocking a few tables over in the process.

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What is the first thing you should do when a person is choking? Make sure the person is choking How can you tell if a person is choking? If he's going like this: aaghh gaghhg agghhh gaghhhhh ghghaghghgh

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Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

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what do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question ................

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1+1=2

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This is an antijoke It doesn't have to rhyme.

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North Korea is red. Amerika is blue. But they both split blood. All over you

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Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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Tilt your screen back

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on the training and hence productivity of the babies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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Why can't kids do drugs in school? Because it's against the rules.

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Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

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Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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like if u think princess kenny is the fairest maiden in all the land. if u dont, disregard this message.

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So a boy walks into a bar. He broke his arm and now is severly crippled

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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