Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

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I'm Andrew Schmitt

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A man walks into a resteraunt and joins his friends. Then he realized he had no friends. ~YN~

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

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Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

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A white man, a black man, a Mexican man and a Chinese man were on the same bus. The didn't socialize cuz that would count as racism

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Q - Why did the baby spit out his dummy? A - Because i stabbed him.

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What did one dolphin say to the other after watching a banana dance with an afro. My pancreas was replaced with a mango.

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

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Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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What did the black man say to the fat Irish lady? Hi.

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What did the orange say to the apple? Nothing, fruits can't talk.

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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Why didn't john go to school? He has terminal cancer and he must stay at hospital

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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What is funnier than the funniest thing in the world? Something funnier than the world!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops