Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't care! What are you doing in my house?

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Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why was the frog sad? Because he had a boy's face stapled to his feet.

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What's the funniest thing about the holocaust? Nothing it wasn't a joke

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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So a horse walks into a bar... I forget the rest of the joke but you're mom is a whore..

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How many turrets patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cocksucker!!

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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what did Russell wilson get for Christmas a seahawk..

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What's the easiest way to become President? Have a background in politics and a catchy campaign slogan that voting Americans can relate to.

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You've got more chins than a Chinese... Girl with a lot of chins, because she's so fat

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your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

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Whats sorer than stubbing your toe? Stubbing your toe twice

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y u no like me joke?

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Whats worse than three dead women in a ditch ? 4 dead women in a ditch.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

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I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

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What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

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A Jewish, Italian, and Russian man are stranded on an island. Eventually the Russian man dies from heatstroke, leaving the other two to decide whether or not to feast on his remains. The Italian eventually goes mad and tries to murder the Jewish man who is forced to defend himself and kill his remaining friend. Shortly after, the Jewish man is eventually rescued by a passing German vessel after suffering severe dehydration and malnourishment and hanging on only by his faith in God. As they are leading him to safety, the Jewish man eventually summons the strength to tell his saviors about the horrible things he has done and all he has gone through, not knowing if he'll ever be able to forgive himself. His German rescuers take one awkward look at him, and don't know what to say to help him, leading afterwards to several years of PTSD therapy and rehabilitation.

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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