roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a chicken An animal cruelty charge

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

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Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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Yo momma's so fat that all the children within a close proximity of your home think that your mother is a very large woman.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got for Christmas? He's his dad. He bought the presents.

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Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

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what do you call a black man who beats his wife, doesnt have a job and has a ton of kids? whatever his name is.

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Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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why did the two girls fight? Because they were mad at eachother.

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops