- Anti Joke

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What did one stool say to the other stool? Stools don't speak!

Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

Q: What do you call cheese that's not your own? A: Someone else's cheese

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

A racist walks into a bar. Nasty accident you had there mate. You should be more careful next time.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

Why are trees green? I have no idea