What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When is a clown happy? At a child's birthday party.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

a man checks his brand new cellphone to see if he has a text message... He has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red. Violets are purple

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a man that paints on a his face and wears big shoes? Lady Gaga.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the gay lifeguard tell the little boy at the pool? No running!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many black teachers does it take to figure out 10 x 30. only one shes a very respected teacher

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a creepy person trying to break into your house? A robber

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and the killing of 12 other numbers

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a lubia chin jew slave?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Germans conquer Poland so quickly? Heavy military manufacturing and Blitzkrieg battlefield tactics.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy play Xbox? Because its a quality source of entertainment

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Who did sally vote for in 1920 Nobody woman couldnt vote until 1928

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the children say when the magician pulled a rabbit out of his hat? Nothing, but the parents called Animal Control, and the magician was imprisoned after a dog-fighting ring was discovered in Michael Vick's estate.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the penis say to the vagina? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops