why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

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Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

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Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

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What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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XD Thats what I was expecting from you, you do not go down without a bit of struggle and a tussle huh?

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whats worse than the smell of nail polish? burning jews.

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Impossible, fruits to not have the ability to talk.

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Knock knock. Whose there? No one, I'm trying to tell a knock knock joke.

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I went to work Got paid, Then came home.

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Knock Knock! Whos there? Doctor! Doctor who? exactly.. how did you know?

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Q: What do a dead cat and a flower have in common. A: Nothing, just go away.

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What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

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There was a man that invited his uncle, his uncle his uncle his uncle, his uncle and his uncle spidey to a party. He was really dissapointed when he realized that not only was his invitation full of typos, but that he invited Peter Parker twice and forgot to invite spiderman.

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What's the difference between Stephani and a momma hippo? The mother hippo is slowly but surely losing weight while Stephani is packing on the pounds! :)

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A Jew, a Muslim and a Christian walk into a bar. The Muslim is dissatisfied with the choice of the meeting place since the Islam forbids drinking alcoholic beverages.

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Cacti are green Clouds are white Spoons are silver Corn is yellow Carrots are orange Asphalt is black Grapes are purple Cinnamon is brown Lets's have sex

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WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a murderer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops