Why did the Germans conquer Poland so quickly? Heavy military manufacturing and Blitzkrieg battlefield tactics.

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A chicken , a dog and a horse walked into a bar. There were going to the vets but were confused.

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Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

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Your mother is so stupid because as a child, she was unable to keep up with what was being taught as she unfortunately had a learning disability.

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How do you get a priest out of a tree? Throw a canoe at him.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Chuck Norris is so strong that he could bench almost 250 pounds in his heyday.

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What's the difference between you and a polar bear? I don't hate the polar bear

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

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Q: What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

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a seal walks into a club.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the food supply was scarce

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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Q. Whats worse than 9 babies in 1 suitcase? A. 1 baby in 9 suitcases.

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Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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What did the homeless man say to his friends? He doesn't have any friends.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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a kid walks into a room and confesses to his mother he is gay the mother then repeatedly beats him until he is bleeding out of both ears then leaves him there to think about what he just said.

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

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a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

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Your at your local street corner and find a woman, the fact that she has balls dose not stop you from inviting her into your car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops