Your mother is so fat, she tried to suicide because she was unhappy with her weight. She tried a diet and it didn't work; she suffers from depression and went to see a doctor about her weight. Life is getting worse for your mother and she is starting to develop diabetes. Your relatives and cousins are going to the hospital to visit her sometime this week; the doctor says she only has about a week left before she passes away.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black man who likes watermelon and fried chicken? Someone who likes good food.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock-Knock Whos there? You're about to get shell shocked...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why do fat people eat so much? who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the plane crash? Because its pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If life gives you lemons, squeeze it in life' s eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A dog was barking at a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I peek in your window, Yes, I'm watching you

thumb_up thumb_down -9

One time I walked into a fat kid..

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a white man who murdered his whole family? -a murder What do you call a black man who raped five women? -a rapest What do you call a Mexican with a leaf blower -a hardworking legal immigrant working twelve hours seven days a week to support his wife and three children.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What smells like dead rats? Dead hamsters

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

name one thing that is impossible!! A sober irishman

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What crawls on the ground and shoots arrows? Legless Legolas.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Chuck Norris once starred in a movie with Bruce Lee.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops