Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

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Why would it matter if they believed such a thing? Are you trying to screw me over? You know that I am very competent at making myself seem like a total jackass myself right? You got a point, it is not my role to help others in life, I just guess I enjoy repairing others, it sure is a hell lot easier than repairing myself, I just enjoy repairing things I can repair I suppose, now using them as my henchmen that's just worthless. The way I see it, people that wage wars, control others, indoctrinate them, and/or accumulate great sums of wealth to the point where, well its pointless, are all just overcompensating, trying to make up for something that they cannot repair within themselves. It is only natural, I mean we humans, if we lack something, we get a lot more of something else. Thanks, you are right about that whole "soul incident" as I call it, it is strange how people often seem to know each other a lot better than they know themselves, I mean I could at any time choose to quit, to become like others, to surrender my individuality, to "give up my soul" or rather the essence of what makes us unique. But you know, ill rather die than live as a servant for a society many would say I never truly learned to understand. Truth is, I will never accept it, if true strength stops arriving from within, its because people choose to seek it from others, the day I require the approval of others in order to sustain myself, ill off myself, that's not a real definition of existence as far as my opinion goes. I mean what are we worth to ourselves, if we become beings that base our so called value on what others think about us? We should focus on becoming those that spread joy and inspire others, rather than to seek inspiration and joy from others. Why? Because its a win win scenario, you cannot spread joy if you got none, you cannot inspire others if we have no inspiration, I guess you can fake it, sometimes until it becomes real, but that is mental-ism and not ideology (not that they are complete opposites, and if they are not opposites, they can work as a synergy) I guess I had forgotten about that, tell yourself that you are great enough, and you become great, excuse me, I am dead tired, its been hours, say, how are you doing?

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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9/11.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

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when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. when life gives you melons, you are soon diagnosed with dyslexia.

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. Watching your attorney drive off a cliff in your new car.

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What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

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Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

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what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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What did the slave say to its master? Nothing meanwhile he and his family had terminal cancer and were worked without pay for 20 years before dying fro, multiple cases of AIDS and infections within thier lungs and mouths.

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It says so on your cap.

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did you hear the joke about the lobster and the clownfish? no.. oh.

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What's worse than finding half of a worm in an apple? a razorblade.

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24

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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Ya know what's funny? A joke well-told by a professional comedian.

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A: If you were stranded on an island and you could only have one thin, what would it be? B: A boat A: That makes sense

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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Why did the boy go back in time? He didn't. He was mutilated by rabid apes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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