Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

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Whats the difference between a Bicycle and a duck? They Both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

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What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

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Q: What's so special about my Ferrari? A: It was painted with babies

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Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

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How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

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A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

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A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

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Here's a joke The Holocaust.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A terrorist. What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. What are you racist or something?

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

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Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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