how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

How do you stop a car from hitting a kid? You don't.

Jim: You know whats funny? Bob: What? Jim: The 28th Amendment.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

a suicidal man walks up 49 floors and enters a room and opens the window. hes worked there for 5 years and the air condition is broken

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because their both fruits.

Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

What did batman say to robin before they entered the batmobile? Get in.

How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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