What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A blonde walks into a bar; she orders and enjoys her drink and then leaves with her thirst quenched.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

thumb_up thumb_down -9

1: I know a lot of people hate Mondays, but my least favorite day of the week is Thursday. 2: Can I ask why? 1: Of course you can. Everyone has free will.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To pick up the remains of the thousands of his friends that lost their lives to this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

your mother is in alkatraz as she was sentenced to 25 to life due to false accusations

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black guy with a white guy name? Bradley

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I got a new jacket. The jacket had real cotton inside the sleeves. The next day my new jacket was gone, but the one i bought yesterday wasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -9

MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb Why? Because they're so darn stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -9

. HAHAHAHA I have control of you I don't enjoy that picture.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Keep Scrolling Penis Keep scrolling Keep scrolling

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops