What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman.

The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

Whats worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings? A car crash Whats worse than a car crash? 3 bee stings

Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

A bear walks into a bar. Animal control was contacted and the bar was evacuated.

Why did the boy cry Because he fell

I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

Arrow in the Knee!

Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

a white guy a black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar.

Q. Why was little Timmy crying? A. Because his sister died of cancer.

What's funny about black people? The fact that they are all in prison for not being visible at night time.

"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

Naturally us at the order of exile, the ones that learn and teach the ways of Nero do not exist. Soon neither will those that speak against us. - Azure Dragon

Have you heard of that new jewish car? No, have you? No.

Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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