what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

What's worse than waking up with a hangover? Not waking up at all

A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

Roses are red, violets are blue, I am a bitch, and so are you!

Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

What did the blonde say to the brunette? We both have hair

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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