Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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If God gives you lemons you find a new God

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I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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Yo mama looks so much like a cardboard box, my kindergarten class graduated.

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Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the grocery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons"

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What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

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a. how did you shoot the rabbit? b. with my banana

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse begins bucking wildly, injuring three patrons before breaking through the front door.

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What did the PC say to the Mac? Nothing you idiot! Computers can't talk.

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What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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want to hear a cat joke? i'm just kitten....

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whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

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How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

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what do you call a black clerk? one of the 2 billion people with a job, u bum!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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