- Anti Joke

What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

AIDS.

Roses are red Violets are blue if you think this is funny then your a jew!

What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't stab you 17 times in the kidney?

A racist walks into a bar. Nasty accident you had there mate. You should be more careful next time.

Why did the man fall of the cliff? A: Because someone pushed him.

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

q. what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile a. hey robin get in the bat mobile

Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.