Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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You know what's a joke? Something Funny

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What's brown and sticky? My ass.

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what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

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What do you call a Mentally Challenged Black Man? Whatever Name his parent(s) Gave him at birth.

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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When life gives you lemons you squirt them in someones eyes and steal what life gave them.

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who. *giggle*

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Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

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Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

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This is the same thing you told me once, believe me, it helps holding into it.

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Why did the black man get sent to prison? He had committed many crimes and was finally caught by the police.

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how are a ferrari and a pile of dead babies similar? neither are good to have in your garage when the police come.

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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Give to the less fortunate. Date ugly people

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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