Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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What did the nerd say to the cheerleader? Wouldn't you like to know? Mind your own business.

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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What do you call a black elephant? An elephant.

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roses are red,violets,are green who tf shit in the toilet?

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My Boyfriend

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What did the tourist in Africa get? AIDS

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There's a black guy in a mansion. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

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Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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Knock Knock ... Knock Knock The man proceeds to leave.

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How do we achieve world peace? KILL EVERYBODY. Nobody can fight when they're dead.

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Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

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Charlie Sheen

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

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That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops