A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what did one swedish guy say to another swedish guy? I dont speak russian

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

how do you finish a 30000 piece puzzle you search for cheat codes

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

two peanuts were walking down the street. but one was unsalted...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

No

thumb_up thumb_down -23

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

okay so theres this guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? Ask her.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's more likely to happen in 2011 than the rapture? Finding my real parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

epic win?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

This is an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a black man? A normal human being

thumb_up thumb_down -23

your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops