What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

Roses are red, Violets are violet. The man who wrote this, Was high as shit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

jack and jill went up a hill so jack could lick jills candy but jack got a shock and a mouth full of C O C K cause jill's real name was randy... ... and joe diragi liked it

A priest, a paedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. And that's just the first guy

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

Why did the terminal cancer patient die? Because he fell of the stairs with his wheelchair.

Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

you first

Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

Wanna here a good joke?

It's so hot even chuck noris can't withstand this shit.

What do u call a boomerang that doesnt come back A stick

Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

i had sex.

Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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