You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

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Jokes Ki Duniya

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Why do girls not have to have drivers license? Because they don't need a car to get from the bedroom to the kitchen ;) Don't mean to offend anybody! His joke is just funny

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Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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The only difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is the taste.

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What do you call a Mexican in a suit? Another Drug lord What do you call a black guy in a suit? Guilty. What do you call a white guy in a suit? The black guys lawyer What do you call a woman in a suit? You don't call her anything as you wonder why she isnt in the kitchen. What do you call a women outside a kitchen? Useless. -Jordan.M

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WHY DO IDIOTS RIGHT STUPID JOKES BECAUSE THEY HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH THERE LIVES.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

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Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

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why could the black person jump higher than the white person. because the white person had no legs

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? an email from PETA

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

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Penis.

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What do you call a blue colored dog with seven legs, that oinks? not a dog...

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CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!$$$$bOoBiEs

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How do you get girls to watch a crappy movie? Tell them Taylor Lautner is in it.

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Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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what do you call a woman that didnt make you a sandwich? An ambulance

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A man walked in a bar and asked for 10 shots. (not descriptively) The bar tender got his gun out and shot the man 10 times. Another man asked for three stabs at it. The bar tender stabbed him 3 times. The last man asked for a bomb load. The bar tender gave him 100's of granades. Then the man bombed down the bar with the bar tender inside

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A blond and a brunette are on the moon. The brunette says to the blond "I'm glad that independent company's are taking the job of American space travel."

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A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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