Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

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how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

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Getting an STD. What's worse than mixing up the order of the joke and the punchline?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a chicken An animal cruelty charge

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

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An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

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What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

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You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

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Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

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No.

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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