Q.How do you kill a Zombie? A. You can't Zombies are fictional monsters that do not exist in our reality. instead why not focus on killing other things such as, Terrorists, Ants and People who piss you off

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Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

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this is just a tribute to the greatest anti-joke ever told as I can't quite remember how it went, but you gotta beleive me, you just had to be there, it's a matter of opinion.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a banana? Banana's don't hijack planes.

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What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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ring ring,Who is? you'r face.you'r face how?you'r but hole face.

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Where would you be unlikely to find a polar bear? In a courtroom.

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Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

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what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

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What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

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Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

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Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? her dad threw a refrigerator jlr

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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Why did the boy jump off a bridge? Because he saw it on tv

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Jerry Sandusky prefers twenty eight year olds. 20 eight year olds.

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Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

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im gey

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A man walks into his house to see his TV is moving. He notices a black man who starts running when he enters. He then calls the police and gives a description of the man. The robber gets placed under arrest.

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Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

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Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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