What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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Roses are blue Colton is gay

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally...

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -George. -George Who? -George Carpenter, Remember? We were in the same class in third grade. -Come on in!

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

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roses are head mydick is blue i live in somolia and i killed all the jews

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

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why did jimmy stop eating his breakfast two Penn state officials knocked at the door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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