Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What kind of bread makes pickles? Dill Dough

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why do canadians have a lower violent crime rate than the U.S? Because they were all raped as children and are now afraid of getting raped again when bathing in prision.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Pineapple.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

69.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

69

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I would, but I see an older version of the kid, that suffered so much pain and agony.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

They say you are what you eat, but i don't remember eating a big bowl of sexy.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Sally fall off the swing? - Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up again? - Because she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her? - Because she had no friends. Knock knock. -Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar He drinks the night away with his friends *Plot Twist* It was a dream He has no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Fox News

thumb_up thumb_down +4

17

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why should you never eat a jellyfish on a Wednesday? Because it will sting you with its poison.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops