Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Anything involving women..

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If life throws you melons, you should do your best to avoid them. Large and hard objects such as melons can easily harm you if moving at high speeds. Fortunately, life is not a physical entity that can throw melons or anything else - so the chances of this event occurring to you are exceedingly low.

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what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Two crabs are standing on a wall. One of them falls down. The second one's name is Georges.

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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once upon a time there was a cripple little girls who lived in an orfanage were she got raped then beat .

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Q: Why did the black man die poor? A: Because he was financially irresponsible and wasted the millions left to him by his father fueling his alcohol addiction, slowly grinding away at his organs until he died of cirrhosis of the liver.

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What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

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Future last words Guess who edition: "This new prototype Ferrari XZ handles like a God even at full speed!...Well, if God had no brakes and his turning ability suddenly disappeared when going at over 300 kilometers per hour that is..." "Uh oh now! Another heart attack! Where is mah medical weed? SHAAAAAROOOOOOON!" "Please haters, lower your guns, I will stop singing! Beliebe me!" Moral: "OMG I AM ONLY THE SIXTH MOST USELESS THING NOW!" "MY BODY IS NOT READY! Urgh mah chest... CHAROOOOOOON!

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Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

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What does a homeless man get for Valentines Day? Divorce papers

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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4 gay guys walk into a bar but there is only one bar stool, where do they sit? They go to a different bar

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david weres the slug gone

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Have you seen Ray Charles' house? No. Neither has he...

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roses are grey violets are grey im color blind

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what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

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what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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How did Mario finally defeat Bowser? He took Steriods

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Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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