Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1Kuo-n7Du0

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

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What is the deferince between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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Title IX

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How do you tell if someone likes butter? You ask them

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender. How do you get them out? Well you shouldn't. Leave the car in front of somebody that you hate's house.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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What happened to the man who ate a piece of pizza after doing a lot of sit ups, while rubbing the belly of a fat man, and feeding his baby at the same time? He Lived

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"Ask me if I'm a lamp." "Are you a lamp?" "No."

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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What did the cow say to the farmer? moo

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops