When you have read this, you've already read it.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

This anti-joke below is hilarious.

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

Knock Knock *opens the door*

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

Why don't women wear watches? In the technological age we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

So a man walks into a bar, right?

Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

Roses are red Violets are blue Everyone on antijoke that steals what I write go to hell My toaster has down syndrom.

You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

If the camel has seven toes and the armadillo has thirteen, why does your mom pleasure herself to a picture of George Clooney ?

What do you call a black man on steroids? Strong.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

Why was Andy's resume declined? Because he was molested as a child.

OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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