If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

Where's my tractor?

Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Alex watched his grandfather tear up as he told him the terrors of the Holocaust. Apparently killing Jews is hard on people.

Who did sally vote for in 1920 Nobody woman couldnt vote until 1928

What do fruits and computers have in common. Microsoft.

why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

how do you make a plumber cry A: kill his family

Why did the blind man walk into a shop He didin't walked into a wall

whats worse than getting killed by a random tomahawk in COD mostly anything because COD is only a video game

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

Roses are red, Because they can intrinsically change color through natural dyes.

A man walks into a bar and sees two girls making out. He orders a drink and leaves.

Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

Q: What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A: A park bench can support a family of four.

ask me if i'm a tree are you a tree? No.

Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

roses are red violets are dead honey is yellow and so is head

Knock, Knock Who's there? The FBI

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John, your son. Now open the door.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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