What does a black man do in the bathroom? He Dookies on bobby

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, now so do you.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Three jews walked into a bar I lied, it was a gas chamber

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What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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Why did the boy Drop his Ice Cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

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why am i so sexy? I was raised by a dog.

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So 2 apples are having sex, and one apple sais to the other, I got worms.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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Q:What has more brains than the baby you just shot? A:The wall behind it!!!

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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why did the clown stop laughing? because it got hit by an axe

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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Tim and Eric

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What's worse than a gay joke? Their emotional repercussions, leading to a lack of self-esteem, which eventually drives the homosexual to commit suicide, leaving behind a now destroyed family.

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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