why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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oh whatever donald trump's not going to be president. stop pretending he is

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What do you get when you cross a dead monkey, a chair fitted with wheels for use as a means of transport by a person, Isaac Newton & the creator of the website? Stephen Hawking.

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

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What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

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What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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a boy meets a girl the rest is censored

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When Gronkowski spikes the ball, 20 children die.

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What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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3 guys walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

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Once there was a girl named Andrea

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Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

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derp

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What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

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How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

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The dewey decimal system

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "Where's my tractor?"

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What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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