When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're adopted and Santa Claus isn't real

What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? You might spill your beer

How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I don't have a last name.

a man walks in to a night club he can not danse so he just wachis pepol

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

I scream You scream The police come It's awkward.

VaginaBoob ^.^

Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

A neutron walked into a bar and asked "how much for a drink?" The bartender did not reply because a neutron is so small he didn't notice that it even entered.

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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