What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

Why did the little and energetic girl fall down? Because I snapped her neck.

You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

What do you get when you rub 2 redheads together? Fire.

whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

What would EARTH without ART be? EARTH, you dummy.

What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

GINGERVITIS! 1. redhair 2.freckles 3.no soul 4.depression/anger 5.gay JLR

Who wants water? I do.

what do you call a prostitute with AIDS? Most likely her first name, unless of course you know her and it is normal for you to refer to her by a nickname or some shorter version of her proper first name.

What do you call a black man driving a nice luxury sedan? A man who has, surprisingly, done very well in this economy.

Why did the pervert cross the road? His dick was stuck in the chicken

Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

Why was Timmy sad? He had 15 large cuban men slapping him for 27 hours straight.

Nero was my name thousands of years ago, but I believe that those With clearer sight, brighter minds, those you remaining WITHOUT the sense of Complete doom, oh children of the night, know far better, turn to my side, and sheep you shall be no more, together we shall be Whole once again, the sheperd of this New world! Thumb this up if you have seen the signs... Thumb this up if you have seen the sins... ...End up buried under the corpses of everything you knew if you have no vision in this New dawn of ages endlessly darknening, and pretend that the internet will be there, or that the horsehead network ever mattered to you for that matter... :You say insanity today, sunday 27th January 2016, you will be the one running, begging that Our world is but YOUR INSANITY, a nightmare, which only Death will awaken you from

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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