Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

i like my coffee like i like my women... Without a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Care to fill in some of the etc etc`s for me? Its not like we are complete strangers one to another either, you and I I mean, I feel pretty secure around you.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call two gays with small dicks? Trace and Jacob

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a guy with no arms, no legs, and floats? Nothing, its rude to make fun of disabilities.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walked into his house to find that his wife was cheating on him with another man. He was furious, and killed himself

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A person from Singapore eats

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A black man, a white man, and an Asian man walk into a bar. The black man says, "My wife died in a terrible book-keeping accident.". The white man says, "My wife died in a terrible lightbulb-sorting accident.". The Asian says, "My wife died in a terrible geography accident.". Soon after, the bar was hit by a missile, promptly killing the three men.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

if you spell clever backwards you get a mixture of letters that don't make sense

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Dude did you hear of that mexcican who made a succesful living? Yeah. Me too,

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's funnier than a joke book? 2 joke books.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a retarded black man? His name

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops