Six hats walk out of a garden. When mustard offal fruit paps.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away her Gameboy.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

96 there mad at each other instead its 69

There are three muffins sitting in an oven. The first one says nothing. The second one also says nothing. They're just muffins and muffins can't talk.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

A seal walks into a club.

whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A: A quadriplegic.

What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

child labor

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

A blind man walked past a fish store. For a second he thought it might be a womens vaginal odor, but then concluded it was most likely a fish store, and went on with his day.

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

A lady walks into her bedroom and sees her boy friend having sex with another girl. She hears the phone ring and a voice says "your grandma died".

Whats the difference between an american and a arab? Their Ethnicity.

Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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